So Many Star Wars Movies: Content Warning

Facebook is giving us tons of problems today, so if you are also having trouble and were wondering about content warnings: we didn't have any for this month's screening.

But, if you are worried about any possible content, please email us and we'll get back to you ASAP!

Tim: TimMonsters@gmail.com
Colette (me): EmmaLowmax@gmail.com

Seriously, if you are ever concerned about possible content (violence, gore, language, clowns, misogyny, racism, animal death, tubas, explosions, nudity, literally anything), do not hesitate to reach out! We would rather people get fun surprises at our screenings rather than have their PTSD suddenly triggered.

Third Clue: July's Mystery Movie

Clue #3: This month's movie is an alternate cut, one that most people prefer but don't get to experience too often.

Tape Freaks Presents: July's Mystery Movie at the Trylon Cinema, July 3rd @ 7:00pm, only $5!

****Purchase advance ticket here****

So Many Star Wars Movies: The Holiday Special

If you've never seen the Star Wars Holiday Special, then it might not be confusing when I say that people gather at the Bryant Lake Bowl every year to watch it. (They also collect donations for Toys for Tots, a lot of donations.) It's a great gathering of people who want to have fun while watching something so, so, so, so very bad it hurts. No really, let me tell you how bad things get:

Seems reasonable so far, right?

Oh. Well that's not creepy...

The plot unfolds something like this: Chewbacca's family (Malla, Lumpy, and Itchy) are preparing for Chewbacca's return from a Rebel space mission so the family can celebrate Life Day together. A local trader and family friend (Art Carnie) arrives at the family home just ahead of an Imperial ship, who want to search the home for Chewbacca, who is luckily still on his mission. From here it turns into your standard holiday special of the time, with special guest stars singing and dancing their way through the most painful performances of their lives.

I might have failed to mention: In the first twenty mins of this show, the only dialogue is spoken in Wookie. "How fun!" you might have thought. But I also might have failed to mention that there are absolutely zero subtitles translating all that dialogue, so you're literally watching the opening of a show where you stand no chance of understanding what's going on. For. Twenty. Whole. Minutes.

There's so much more that's hard to believe: The Wookie opening to the movie only seems like it could be the wildest thing that happens in the special, but there's also a scene where the grandpa Wookie (Itchy) watches what amounts to a VR lap dance, in the family living room. We not only get to see the VR show through his eyes, but we're treated to his reactions as well. 

Another thing that's hard to believe: The Holiday Special gives us the first appearance of Boba Fett. 

And so, so, so, so much more weirdness: I can't even begin to explain how far off the rails this special goes, it's honestly something you have to witness to fully understand.

The Bryant Lake Bowl tradition: The entry fee to this spectacular spectacle is a toy donation for Toys for Tots. Every year the number of toys collected grows substantially, which seems to mean the attendance also grows each year. (Or at least the hopeful attendance grows, as the shows inevitably "sell" out.) Before the first SWHS BLB screening event, Chris Grap (the mastermind behind this event) reached out to the writer of this mind-boggling show and, to everyone's total surprise, got a response: a letter apologizing for the atrocity that is the Star Wars Holiday Special. So every year, Chris Grap reads this formal letter of apology to an audience dressed to the Star Wars nines, who are bursting with generosity, and are ready to sit through one of the most painful attempt at entertainment to ever cross the airwaves. 

What's that? You still want to join this mind-melting tradition?: Honestly, the only way I can imagine watching the SWHS is surrounded by a sea of Star Wars cosplayers who've all gathered in the spirit of generosity and fun. If you're gonna watch the SWHS, this is one hundred percent the way to go. (Like their FB page to stay updated on screening dates.)

Second Clue: July's Mystery Movie

Clue #2: This month's movie features an actor early in his career, who would go on to act in over 300 other projects, with some of his more iconic rolls coming later in life.

Tape Freaks Presents: July's Mystery Movie at the Trylon Cinema, July 3rd @ 7:00pm, only $5!

****Purchase advance ticket here****

So Many Star Wars Movies: Even Actual Star Wars Movies!

Before I get into it here, let me be clear: even when we don't like a movie ourselves, we will never judge you for liking a movie. We might joke about it or give you guff, but really, we just want you to enjoy what makes you happy! And that goes for everything (unless you're hurting someone else*): drink a pumpkin spice latte, eat a pizza with pineapple on it, go for a bike ride when it's 90 degrees out (stay hydrated please), go for a jog, ferment your own hot sauce, post pictures of your pets/kids/food/self to social media, wear a crop-top (on any body), paint your nails a fun/sparkly color. We are on this planet once, do the things you want to do (without hurting anyone else*). And just as importantly, let other people enjoy their own runs on this planet (as long as they're not hurting anyone else*). There's room for everyone to experience joy.

Even in the Star Wars movie franchise, there are a lot of Star Wars movies. Some are more wholly accepted than others, some are more wholly dismissed than others, some even shift where they fall on that scale over time. But the one that gets the most universally dragged, by far, is The Phantom Menace. This movie is so actively despised and ridiculed that some of the actors involved quit acting all together. I'm not sure people should have quit acting all together because of one character they played (Robert Pattinson for instance is a much better actor than his Twilight roles), but full disclosure: I've never seen The Phantom Menace. 

Everything I know about this movie I learned from watching the Red Letter Media review, listening to people complain about it, and seeing it parodied in pop culture. It wasn't until I started asking people from a younger generation about the prequels that I got any positive feedback on this movie (or the next two really). People who saw Episodes I-III when they were younger have a genuine love for these films, and who's to say they should feel any other way? But when you hold them all together, there are some clear reasons that the prequels fall pretty far down the enjoyable-list for fans of the franchise.

When I watched the Red Letter Media reviews I learned a TON, not just about the films themselves, but about writing and film in general. And even if you enjoy The Phantom Menace, this is a pretty unflinching examination of why most people didn't, but it's also very constructive in it's criticism. (Also, they're hilarious!) So, if you've never watched these reviews, or haven't revisited them in a long time, watch these cultural gems and remind yourself that films can be enjoyed even when they are epically and unequivocally bad! 

*Seriously, if you derive pleasure from hurting other people, stop what you're doing and allow yourself to get help. There are people who dedicate their lives and careers to helping people move past unhealthy expressions of anger and frustration. Here's a very good resource to start with, and remember that getting help is literally part of human nature, even though our dominant society is set up to keep us isolated and suffering: Walk In Counseling Center (Minneapolis and St Paul)