Second Clue: January's Mystery Movie

Clue #2: This month's film utilizes (or more likely lifts) the music of Tangerine Dream and Wendy Carlos, as well as parts of Richard Band's score to Re-Animator.

Tape Freaks Presents: January's Mystery Movie at the Trylon microcinema, Wednesday, January 4th@ 7:00pm, only $5!

****Purchase advance ticket here****

The Films of Godfrey Ho: An Introduction to The Man

When talking about Godfrey Ho, we've often referred to him as the Ed Wood of ninja movies, but that comparison gives Wood far too much credit. Ho's short but amazingly prolific career makes Wood's seem quaint. 

Godfrey Ho's IMDb page lists 149 directing credits, 30 of which were released in the year 1988 alone. He also has 121 writing credits, and more than 70 other credits. Almost 100% of these credits come during a 22 year time span. That's more than impressive, it's almost impossible! But, it's also an indication of what kind of quality we're looking at.


Many Godfrey Ho movies shoehorn in a subplot featuring American actors in suspiciously mismatched footage, wearing the most 80s "ninja" costumes you could possibly imagine, talking to each other about ninja-ing while getting everything you could possibly get wrong about ninja, 100% wrong. These subplots are completely nonsensical and full of laughable overdubbed dialogue. That isn't to say the rest of the over dubbing makes more sense, nothing said on screen matches what happens on screen.

The man himself.

Speaking of the main plots, each Ho film we watch seems to be two movies cut together in ways that could makes sense (if you ignore the 80s ninja) but always manage to fall short of that. That only makes the action scenes that much more enjoyable though because you have absolutely no idea what is going to happen. Literally anything can (and usually does) come from left field in the middle of a pretty straight forward action scene, and it's always wonderful.


And we've only scratched the surface when it comes to watching his films, but each time we think we've seen it all, he pulls out some new stops leaving us to assume it couldn't get weirder than that, surely...

First Clue: January's Mystery Movie

Clue #1: The theme for January's screening: The Films of Godfrey Ho.

While watching Godfrey Ho films we have witnessed a wedding between a ghost and vampire, ninja fights cut into movies that otherwise feature no ninja, and recurring appearances of a Garfield phone. These are a just fraction of the gems we’ve uncovered while watching Godfrey Ho movies, its high time we shared one with you!

Tape Freaks Presents: January's Mystery Movie at the Trylon microcinema, Wednesday, January 4th@ 7:00pm, only $5!

****Purchase advance ticket here****

Star Wars Holiday Special at Bryant Lake Bowl 10th Anniversary

A taste of one of the posters available!

Tonight will be the 10th Toys for Tots drive at Bryant Lake Bowl featuring the abomination that is the Star Wars Holiday Special. If you've never seen how bad this thing is first hand, this is a really fun environment watch it in. Audience members cosplay, there's booze and food on hand, plus you're in great company!

There are also two different screen printed commemorative posters designed and printed by local artists, so you can remember the horror forever and ever. Check out the fun if you can, tickets run out pretty so secure them as early as you can today!


The 10th Annual Star Wars Holiday Special Toys for Tots Benefit!, Wednesday December 14th @ Bryant Lake Bowl & Theater, doors open at 3:30, 6:30, & 9:30 (for screenings at 4:00, 7:00, & 10:00). Ticket price is a toy donation for Toys for Tots, tickets are available starting at noon!!

Detail of another poster!

Third Clue: December's Mystery Movie

Clue #3: This month's movie might be as Christmasy as a Starbuck's Holiday cup, but it's pretty universally remembered as a Christmas horror and very often shows up on holiday horror lists.

Tape Freaks Presents: December's Mystery Movie at the Trylon microcinema, Wednesday, December 7th@ 7:00pm, only $5!

****Purchase advance ticket here****

Holiday Horror: Tales From the Crypt, And All Through the House

We've recently picked up a few seasons of Tales From the Crypt and have been quickly watching through them. Both Tim and I watched the show when it originally aired but hadn't revisited it since, so we weren't really sure if we were in for a dashing of our nostalgia or a treat from our past. But not only is it really great mindless fun, but there's ton of talented people that worked on the show on both sides of the camera. Not so surprising when you see the executive producers were Robert Zemekis, Joel Silver, David Giler, Richard Donner and Walter Hill. That team had a hell of a rolodex to pull from at that time. There are episodes directed by actors (Arnold Schwarzenegger, Michael J. Fox, Tom Hanks), there's an episode where Tim Curry plays three different characters, Whoopi Goldberg hangs out with the Crypt Keeper after the episode she's in ends (the only time that happens so far), the whole series is packed with strange, fun, and cheesy surprises!

In the first season there's a great episode that perfectly fits this months theme: And All Through the House. The screenplay was written by Fred Dekker (Night of the Creeps, Monster Squad) and directed by Robert Zemekis (Who Framed Roger Rabbit?, Back to the Future) and you can watch the whole thing on youtube! Grab a candy cane, suck it into a point, and enjoy:

Second Clue: December's Mystery Movie

Clue #2: This month's movie features an actor who was in two different movies that screened at the Trylon during the month of October.

Tape Freaks Presents: December's Mystery Movie at the Trylon microcinema, Wednesday, December 7th@ 7:00pm, only $5!

****Purchase advance ticket here****

First Clue: December's Screening

Clue #1: This month's theme is holiday horror!

Tape Freaks Presents: December's Mystery Movie at the Trylon microcinema, Wednesday, December 7th@ 7:00pm, only $5!

****Purchase advance ticket here****

Third Clue: November's Screening

Clue #3: This month's top-billed-hardly-in-it actor is a favorite here at Tape Freaks, and this is one of the handful of movies that actor has injured another actor on set due to recklessness.

Tape Freaks Presents: November's Mystery Movie at the Trylon microcinema, Wednesday, November 5th@ 7:00pm, only $5!

****Purchase advance ticket here****

Second Clue: November's Screening

Clue #2: The actual star of our film has appeared in 4 long running soap operas.

Tape Freaks Presents: November's Mystery Movie at the Trylon microcinema, Wednesday, October 5th@ 7:00pm, only $5!

****Purchase advance ticket here****

Top Billing for Ten Seconds of Screen Time: Futureworld

Westworld is a fantastic sci-fi movie, but did you know they made a sequel? According to the posters and VHS/DVD cover art, it features Yul Brynner reprising his role as the Gunslinger! And that's true, to a point. 

Yul Brynner does show up in Futureworld in a dream sequence (or flashback), comprised of 100% recycled footage from Westworld. So yes, he is in Futureworld, but if you saw the previous movie, you've already seen every scene he's in. It's a super bummer in a movie that over all isn't terrible.

Top Billing for Ten Seconds of Screen Time: Godzilla (2014)

This movie under-delivers on two star fronts, but the most unforgivable of the two might be the serious lack of Bryan Cranston in the second half of the film. 

This came out while Breaking Bad was still in full swing, so you'd think that Bryan Cranston's character [SPOILER] wouldn't be killed off in the first half of the film. But he was, and it was done in a seriously anticlimactic way.

But Cranston's wasn't the only character with abysmal screen time. In this much anticipated kaiju, with not one but two epic monster foes for Godzilla to save us from, there is hardly any Godzilla on screen. There was a gentleman behind us that literally vocalized every time it seemed like Godzilla was going show up and save the day. He would say "oh, here we go!!!" or some such excited thing. But each time the words left his mouth, the scene would cut to something completely non-Godzilla related. Every. Time. The last such set-up and disappointment was too much for him as he didn't say anything when it was clear Godzilla was going to show, but when it cut away he exasperatedly yelled "COME ON!!", and everyone in the audience was 100% with him. 

It's one thing to tease an audience, it's entirely another to tease an audience with a Godzilla movie staring Bryan Cranston only to switch it out for a movie staring Aaron Taylor-Johnson featuring a special appearance by Godzilla.

Top Billing for Ten Seconds of Screen Time: Black Eagle

Sometimes the top billed actor only gets top billing after they get famous, and Black Eagle is a great example of this. Many of the VHS and DVD covers feature Jean Claude Van Damme sharing top billing with Sho Kosugi suggesting they are the main stars of the film. In reality, Kosugi is the star, while JCVD plays the villain's main henchman. That's not to say Damme is completely absent in the film, but he's sure not the focus.

But, because this movie came out the same year as Blood Sport, the producers of the film must have decided to cash in on JCVD's new popularity. And based on the more recent releases (where Kosugi's involvement isn't even hinted at) this charlatan tactic seems to be working well for them...

But the marketing isn't the only after thought in this, mildly entertain, snooze fest. There's a scene near the end of the film, where JCVD and Kosugi face off, that seems really shoe horned in. JCVD is cut to over a long action sequence, but his actions don't seem to effect anyone until Kosugi shows up out of nowhere and the two men fight. After about 5 mins, Kosugi swan dives off a cliff face, leaving Damme to lick his wounds, and the incident is never mentioned again...

Top Billing for Ten Seconds of Screen Time: Scream

Not unlike Psycho with Janet Leigh, every trailer for Scream focused heavily on Drew Barrymore's character and she was prominently featured on all the posters. Then she was [DECADES OLD SPOILER] killed in the first ten mins of the film. 

But unlike the intentional casting choice in Psycho, Barrymore was initially cast as the lead in Scream but was later forced to take a role with less screen time due to a conflicting commitment. Though the switch in rolls was for the better, as it leaves the audience feeling that literally anything could happen after the biggest star [SAME SPOILER] is killed before the movie even starts.

Scream and Psycho were also alike in the legacies they left. Where Psycho left an abundance of sophisticated horror movies in it's wake, Scream inspired a full on resurgence of the horror/murder-mystery genre. (They share some surprisingly good sequels in their respective franchises to boot!) 

Top Billing for Ten Seconds of Screen Time: Psycho

Sometimes the bait-and-switch of billing of a star isn't to sell you on a movie that is otherwise horrible, sometimes it sets the bar for every horror movie that comes after it...

Janet Leigh was featured on all the posters for Psycho, listed in all the promotional materials, stars in the first act, and then [DECADES OLD SPOILER] is killed 20 mins into the movie. The decision to feature Leigh was likely to lull the audience into believing that nothing could happen to her character. Her star power coupled with the focus of the first act squarely on her character would have only added to the shock value of her murder. That creative decision would set the tone for countless horror movies that came after (a couple we'll touch on this month) but this movie's restraint in the gore department was a crack in the gore dam that Herschell Gordon Lewis would break open with Blood Feast only 3 years later.

First Clue: November's Screening

Clue #1: The this month's theme: Top Billing for Three Seconds of Screen Time. 

Tape Freaks Presents: November's Mystery Movie at the Trylon microcinema, Wednesday, October 5th@ 7:00pm, only $5!

****Purchase advance ticket here****

Kids Playing Kids: Beasts of the Southern Wild

Neither Quvenzhané Wallis and Dwight Henry had never had an acting gig before filming this movie, the "professional" crew was minimal and filled out with the help of locals, it was shot on 16mm, it was the directors first feature length film; yet everyone involved was for nominated and won many, many awards. It's seriously one of the best movies to come out in recent years, and if you haven't seen it, you are missing out.

(Though I love this movie completely, it's 100% out of my wheelhouse to explain, so I asked my movie critic friend Ian Nichols to help me out by writing a synopsis. He did, and it's pretty damn wonderful.)

Beasts of the Southern Wild: Magical realism, normally commandeered by white Hollywood, makes its way deep into the South, past the levies, and into the thigh-high-and-climbing waterways among a group of islands off the coast of Louisiana. A bayou community straddling the gulf between the sobering effects of climate change and heady faith, spends its days not care free but blindly wading through alcoholism, poverty, and survival. At the eye of this tempestuous domain is the heart of it: Hushpuppy (Quvenzhane Wallis), a spirited young girl with immense imagination. She conjures giant uni-horned warthogs, and endures the harsh reality with her boozy, widowed father. Director/writer/composer Benh Zeitlin’s Beasts of the Southern Wild is an ugly world made otherworldly—one that is astonishingly beautiful, raw, and enchanting, seen through the eyes of a child embraced by a murky future.

Quvenzhane Wallis: This was Wallis' very first acting job, and when the movie started filming she was only 6 years old. But to watch her on screen you'd think she had been the star of, at the very minimum, every single community theater production near enough to her home for her to be in. Seriously, she isn't just the focus of the film; she narrates it and stars in it. She is the film! Beasts of the Southern Wild was nominated for 4 Academy Awards one of which was for her performance making her the youngest Best Actress nominee and it was certainly a deserved nom. (Sadly, #OscarSoWhite so the award obviously Jennifer Lawrence in her seminal performance in that movie about football or something.)

See this movie: If you love Pan's Labyrinth or Hugo, but would be interested in seeing them through a Wes Anderson, John Waters lens.

Thank you again to Ian Nichols, you can find him on Twitter here and here.


Ian Nichols is a Saint Paul, Minnesota-based freelance film critic and co-host of two podcasts: the Flicksation Podcast and the horror movie-centric It’s Only a Podcast.

Kids Playing Kids: Looper

Looper is one of those movies that we have to really pin people down to watch. Some people bristle at the mere mention Bruce Willis' name, others watched a trailer and were less than enthused. But we have yet to screen this movie for someone who didn't enjoy it, and most of those people list the kid's performance as one of the top reasons for loving it.

The plot unfolds something like this: In the future, time travel is real and immediately outlawed. But that doesn't stop mob organizations 30 years into the future from sending their hits back to present day 2044 to have them disposed of by contracted Loopers. Once a looper's 30 year contract runs out, the mob sends him back to be eliminated by his 2044 self. But lately, the loopers of the future are coming back with a deep desire to live, and that's when trouble starts.

Ok, but where does a kid come into this movie?: Well this is another genre mashing movie, sort of. The movie shifts gears pretty hard at one point, but never completely leaves behind it's original elements. In the second act Joseph Gordon-Levitt's character runs smack into Emily Blunt's character and her son, and the rest of the film focuses on the three of them.




The kid: Pierce Gagnon's performance stands out in a cast of seasoned actors. He's not just a precocious kid, he gives his character emotional depth that is compelling in every scene. There is no doubt that he will continue to have a career as long as he chooses to pursue it.



Bonus kid actor mention: Joseph Gordon-Levitt started acting when he was seven and hasn't slowed down since.

Third Clue: October's Screening

Clue #3: The kid who stars in this month's movie has had a solid acting career from the time he was 12 through to present day.

Tape Freaks Presents: October's Mystery Movie at the Trylon microcinema, Wednesday, October 5th@ 7:00pm, only $5!

****Purchase advance ticket here****

Kids Playing Kids: Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory

This movie started out as a giant ad campaign for a candy bar (the candy bar failed, if you're wondering), but became a cult classic in large part because of outstanding performances across the board. (I mean, also because it's a psychedelia nightmare movie, but still.)

The kids: Each kid is introduced with a caricature of bad manners (except Charlie). Each kid (except Charlie) is also accompanied by a sycophant parental chaperone who wittily or no, encourages that abhorrent trait in their child.

Willy Wonka: For most of the movie Wonka comes off as though he's everything short of murdering children. And for most of the adults watching it doesn't seem like a huge deal, which is kinda strange, especially since this is supposed to be a kid's movie.



Why that works: If the kid's performances hadn't been spot on, Wonka sending each one to certain death would have played as though he was a callous serial killer. But because the bratty, single minded, overindulgent and greedy characters are portrayed so well by the children (excluding Charlie), Willy Wonka comes off as less a killer and more like he's living out our darkest adult fantasies about how we would like to deal with ill-behaved children and their parental counterparts...



That's a shame: When the film came out critics who liked the film also glossed over the amazing performances from the kids, failing to even mention the performers by name.

Based on a kids book: Director Mel Stuart's 10 year old daughter was reading Charlie and the Chocolate Factory when she suggested he make the story into a movie with producer David L. Wolper. Wolper agreed and secured funding from the Quaker Oat's Company and they adapted the book into a musical. Quick recap: a 10 year old girl is responsible for this movie's existence!

Second Clue: October's Screening

Clue #2: The visual effects for this month's movie were done by an award winning effects artist who has worked with directors like Peter Jackson, Charles Band, and Larry Cohen.

Tape Freaks Presents: October's Mystery Movie at the Trylon microcinema, Wednesday, October 5th@ 7:00pm, only $5!

****Purchase advance ticket here****

Kids Playing Kids: Mixtape

Tim made a mixtape of 10 music cues taken from horror movies that feature kids, leave a comment if you can identify them all!

Kids Playing Kids: Attack the Block

We saw sneak preview of this movie when it came out instantly fell in love.

The plot unfolds something like this: Aliens seem to be attacking a South London council estate on Bonfire Night. The resident of the estate are oblivious to all this except for a close-knit group of young friends, their weed hook-up, one of his clients, and a young nurse that the close-knit friends attempted to mug earlier in the night. It's up to this rag-tag group to save South London, and very possibly the world...

American translation: Aliens seem to be attacking a South London public housing high-rise on a holiday that is celebrated like the 4th of July. There's lots of intermittent fire works and celebratory shenanigans taking place to cover the presence of the aliens.

Watch it if you like: The Goonies, Shaun of the Dead, The Lost Boys, Alien.



The kids: Every single kid in this movie gives a stellar performance, the youngest of them often steeling scenes. This is also John Boyea's first film and he is as fantastic as you'd imagine.

The social commentary: This movie is brimming with sub-textual  commentary, not the least of which is a moment that highlights that these boys who've spend the whole movie trying to be more adult than they are indeed children. But the film also touches on race, racism, systemic racism, class, ageism and more.

But what else have these kids been in?: Franz Dramen was in Edge of Tomorrow (aka Live Die Repeat) and John Boyea was in this little movie called Star Wars: The Force Awakens.

But did we like it: We love this movie. Highly recommend watching if you like fun, scary, poignant horror movies.

Kids Playing Kids: The Lost Boys

The Trylon is playing Lost Boys on October 2-4th, and you know what that means: we're talking about the Coreys!

The plot unfolds something like this: Lucy and her two sons have moved to Santa Carla to live with her father. No one seems too happy about the situation except Lucy, who has started dating a hansom and wealthy local man. Unfortunately Lucy's oldest son is about to be turned into a vampire by the local hooligan vampires, and it looks like local vampire hunters Edgar and Alan Frog along with Lucy's youngest son will have to save the day.

Haim and Feldman: This was the beginning of the Coreys branding themselves as such, but this is also the best movie that the pair star in together.

Corey Feldman: By this point Feldman already had Goonies, Friday the 13th III, Gremlins, and Stand By Me under his belt, and right after this he would also have The Burb's.

Corey Haim: While researching things to write about Haim I read his entire Wikipedia page, and I have to say, if you want to read a tragic story about drug addiction and child stardom, it's worth reading. On a lighter note, I also discovered that the 1-800-C-O-R-E-Y line that Lisa Simpson calls obsessively in an early episode of the Simpsons was 100% real! (But also has a sad story attached. Seriously, just give his page a skim.)

A classic for a reason: Everyone's performances in this film are on point, and it's one of the few vampire movies that nails both the humor and the horror.

But don't take our word for it, catch one of the screening at the Trylon!

First Clue: October Screening

Clue #1: This month's theme is Kids Playing Kids.

Tape Freaks Presents: October's Mystery Movie at the Trylon microcinema, Wednesday, October 5th@ 7:00pm, only $5!

****Purchase advance ticket here****

Mindless Action: Lucky

Almost a decade ago we stumbled across an impressive and fun action short from Australia, aaaaaand instantly forgot the name of it. After several bouts of searching the internets for any sign of it, we mostly gave up the search. But recently while looking into stuntman/filmmaker Nash Edgerton (who's known for his stunt work for The Matrix movies, the Star Wars prequels, and for stunt doubling for his brother Joel Edgerton), we discovered Nash had written, directed, and starred in a short film to feature his amazing stunt skills. And as it happens, that's the short we saw all those years ago! Check it out and see what kept us obsessed for so long...

Mindless Action: Gone Wrong

Mindless action isn't necessarily devoid of plot or proper character motivation, because when you leave too many elements of a movie neglected, seriously bad things can happen...

A Good Day to Die Hard: You shouldn't be shocked to learn the fifth installment in the Die Hard series is the worst, but we never recommended anyone watch this movie. Even when people say "oh we'll watch it anyway, just to see how bad it is" we say: don't bother. The worst parts of this film are the back and fourth between McClane and his son, and 50% of that is them relentlessly yelling each other's names. (Actually, the worst parts of this movie might be the needless, unaddressed, and seemingly endless slaughter of innocent civilians, but it's hard to focus on those parts with all the "JOHN!" and "JACK!"ing.)

The Glove: Look at that poster, read that tagline! What could possibly be bad about this movie? Oh only that it's one of the most BORING movies we've ever watched in mixed company. Our buddy picked this out of a stack a few years ago and he's still not lived it down entirely. The titular glove shows up like it was shot long after the main film, it never really fits into the larger story and takes up almost no screen time! Also the main detective (played by John Saxon) is a lousy drunk who's terrible at his job and refuses to pay his child support. A better tagline for this movie would be "an asshole detective tries to solve a humdrum crime while we wait for an amazing robo-glove to save the day that almost doesn't show up". 

Chappie: Oh how we wanted to like Chappie, but not only were the character motivations questionable throughout, this film location hopped more than The Stuff and for arguably flimsier reasons. One moment the hero is at Die Antwoord's hideout, the next he's run back to his office only to run right back to the hideout. It's a mess. And we were extra disappointed because this was a forgettable mess, rather than a fun mess.

Mitchell: I can't imagine watching this movie without the Mystery Science Theater 3000 crew relentlessly mocking it. We've never tried, but thinking about it makes me uncomfortable. There's the world's longest, slowest and least action-packed car chase ever committed to film, the most skin crawling "sex" scenes, and it took me far too many viewings to actually understand the plot of the thing. And don't even get me started on the hero's theme song! But, as unbearable as it might be on it's own, it will always be one of our top five MST3Ks.

Prototype X29A: This movie was on our to-watch pile for months before someone finally picked it. Everyone was convinced the phrase "psychosexual dreams" on the box was going to make it a winner for better or worse. But when we actually tried to watch it, it was a SNOOZE fest. One of our friends fell asleep early on only to wake up at the end demanding to know why everything was blowing up, sadly we had no answers for her and we were paying attention!



Bonus movie:

Doctor Justice: To be fair, we did not finish this movie. Maybe someday we'll give it another shot, I mean look at that cover art, action happens at some point! But the 45 mins we made it through was another snooze fest. Seriously though, John Phillip Law, Paul Naschy, and Gert Frobe? How on earth did it end up so dull?!

Mindless Action Movies: Three the Hard Way

This movie would have fit nicely into last month's theme as it stars Jim Brown, Fred Williamson and Jim Kelly but it's also a wonderfully excessive action movie. Not as mindless as some of the others we'll list this month, but no less action packed or over the top.

A casual racist party. (The party is casual, the racism is overt.)

The plot unfolds something like this: White supremacists have developed a biological weapon they are preparing to dump into the water of three major cities. The effects of this weapon? It kills Black people while leaving white people unharmed. Lucky for the Black and anti-racist population at large, Mister Keyes (Jim Kelly), Jagger Daniels (Fred Williamson), and Jimmy Lait (Jim Brown) are on top of this.

The pacing: The set up for this is a bit slow as they introduce each hero individually, but in the end each man takes on his own group of bad guys, so the payoff is three fold!

The stunts: Hal Needham was the stunt coordinator, and it shows. This movie is FULL of amazing stunt work, and it's also got some of our favorite car stunts. They clearly set the bar that the Ozsplpitation movies of the 70s and 80s were trying to raise.

A lovely surprise: These ladies show up out of nowhere making us wish they had a spin off film all their own. (Unfortunate side note: one of them is in The Glove, and we feel really, really bad for her.)

The director: This is one of the 4 movies Gordon Park Jr. directed before his untimely death in a plane crash while filming over seas. He also directed Aaron Loves Angela, Thomasine & Bushrod, and Super Fly. Makes us sad to think what else could have come from this director.